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Little Red Nightmare

Silver moon beams
On a foggy night
Deafening silence splintered
By triumphant howls
Muffled cries trailing behind

Down, down
The rabbit hole
Dragged by the hair
The rank smell of fear
Floats in the air

They push her around
Call her names
Mouth filled with dirt, on bloody knees
One by one, they come
And force her down

Coarse fur against her skin
Feeling the hot breath of sin
Red hood on the floor
She can't take It anymore
Putting a spiked heel through its face

A painful screech
As she breaks loose
Whose next, she screams
As they crowd around
Saliva dripping from their jowls

Lycan soldiers of the dark

What big eyes you have
She whispered hoarsely
All the better to poke them out
And what big ears you have
All the better to hear your shouts

Circling, she watched as they cowered
What big TEETH you all have
She sneered and snarled
So I can RIP THEM OUT

They scampered about
Tails between their legs
Little Red watched as they ran
That will teach them
To screw with her again

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

Gee has gone through and made some adjustments. I will copy and paste to here after. See you tonight

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment

version better, along with the added lines. Makes for a good read. A real twist on Little Red!
~ Gee.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I took your revisions and added a spin. Always glad for your help and guidance. This was a fun write.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

author comment
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