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Last Time Fooled- My promise to you

My love to you
Is a true confession
With a deep share of affectionate
from my pure sincerest heart
Of an unwaveringly profound care
through a testimony declare
With tears that glisten in the morning dew
Displaying on your soft petal cheek
With a refreshing droplet caressing touch
lingering on the green stem flourish heart
Flowing through the absorb of thirst quest
With an aglow smile exuding on your face
Through the radiant sunlight
Brighten up the sorrowful
day of the world
as our journey began
to claim our vow together
that we belong with each other

Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
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Comments

The below is a computer generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

Overall, the poem has a clear message of love and commitment. The use of nature imagery adds depth to the emotions expressed. However, some of the phrasing can be improved to make the poem flow more smoothly.

For example, in the line "With tears that symbolize in the morning dew," the word "symbolize" feels out of place and disrupts the flow. A possible edit could be "With tears that glisten in the morning dew." This change maintains the imagery of tears and dew, while using a more fitting verb.

Additionally, some of the lines feel overly wordy, such as "through a testimony declare." Simplifying to "through my testimony" would still convey the same meaning without sacrificing clarity.

Overall, the poem shows promise and with some minor edits, could be improved to fully capture the depth of the emotions being expressed.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Thank you, Wizard Al, for your constructive feedback. I wish I could be smart like you.

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