Where the devil did I put it?
I had it here last night
I know I put it on the shelf
But now it's not in sight.

Which one of you has moved it?
I know it was not I
Someone must have picked it up
And somewhere else let lie.

Oh! Where the devil is it?
You know the thing I mean
A rusty wooden handle
And head of mottled green.

What do you mean I did not
Put the thing away
I scarcely ever forget things
So what is that you say.

Ok, so just this morning
From the butchers I came back
Alright upon the counter
I left the lamb: a rack.

Yes I know that yesterday
To the bakers I was sent
And returned without the sourdough,
What sort of bread is that.

I'm getting really angry now
See, I've kicked the cat
He knows just how irate I get
Don't look at me like that.

Yes, Ok I'll calm down
I'll have a cup of tea
I'll read the paper, where's my glasses?
You know I cannot see.

Oh God where have I put them?
I had them moments ago
Why do you look at me like that?
I'm wearing them, Oh No!