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I am, He is, We are (Of me, my twin brother and my family)

Submitted by Kammy O. on Thu, 2022-05-26 01:23

I am fearless
Destined for greatness
Shining like the stars above
Accompanied by a dove

I am a beauty
With a kind heart and a duty
To teach the world and tell my stories
To brighten up faces
From a mile
With a smile

He is my handsome man
My number one fan
Who followed me
With a purpose to see
What a wonderful world it'd be
With laughter, joy and amazing beats

We are a family
One-stop-junction for comedy
In the midst of quarrels and fights
We make our worries light

My siblings and I giggle a lot
In happiness we find a fort
All that we cherish is within us
I love you loads like God does

Editing stage:

Editing - rough draft

Content level:

Not Explicit Content

Comments

Geezer

Thu, 2022-05-26 06:57

I really like...

the way you extol the family's interaction and that you are so comfortable with them. The piece itself is one of joy and harmony, even as you say that there are disagreements and differences of opinion. Only thing I see to change is the word
[shining] spelling. Nice job Kammie. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Kammy O.

Thu, 2022-05-26 09:42

Hi ! Mr Geezer.

Hi ! Mr Geezer.
Thank you for the correction.
Glad you like it!

author comment

Candlewitch

Thu, 2022-05-26 10:32

dear kammy,

hello again, it is always nice to see you!

in this line:
He is (my) handsome man I would trade (my) for (a) or(one) because (my indicates lovers)

my favorite lines are:
He is (my) handsome man
My number one fan
Who followed me
With a purpose to see
What a wonderful world it'd be
With laughter, joy and amazing beats

excellent work!!!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Kammy O.

Sun, 2022-05-29 06:58

Thank you Lady Cat for the

author comment

Kammy O.

Sun, 2022-05-29 06:58

Thank you Lady Cat for the

author comment

Candlewitch

Mon, 2022-05-30 09:55

hello Kammy,

did you get the p.m. (private message) I sent you?

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Neopoet

I am, He is, We are (Of me, my twin brother and my family)