Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
A Flower in the Crack...
A flower that has been trod upon
Victim of many attacks
Sustained by helpful nourishing
Grows up through concrete cracks
Rain and soil, accumulate
Debris is used for fodder
The slender plant of beauty
Dreams of clear, blue water
Sunshine gives strength to her
[Of course, it is a she]
Tomboy not withstanding
She means a lot to me
A most accomplished poet
Team player, yessiree
Just ask of her opinion
She'll give you two or three!
Laugh out loud; she does that
Infectious, naughty grin
Tongue-in-cheek advice
Intrique?... "You know, I'm in!"
And so, I'd say to her
"Make sure you stay the course"
Ride the painted pony
A different colored horse!
Style / type:
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
User login
Author information
Region & Country
New York State - USA
Favorite Poets
Poe, Emily Dickenson, Robert Frost, Shakespeare, and many of the poets here at Neopoet.
Other recent work
Active Workshops & Contests
Contest
Workshop
- Splash Pool: How to use imagery in poetry..
- Wading Pool: Neopoet How To Video Resources
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 2
- Olympic Pool: Earn A Poem Workshop 1
- Plunge Pool: Stream Workshop
Comments
Candlewitch
Thu, 2022-05-12 08:45
dear Geez,
I like your title. and the pacing is good, it flows well.
A flower (that) has been trod upon remove the word "that" and it will be smoother, I think. wow what a unique poem, as always can be expected by "Our Geezer" favorite lines are:
And so, I'd say to her
"Make sure you stay the course"
Ride the painted pony
A different colored horse!
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Geezer
Thu, 2022-05-12 11:00
I sort of...
took your suggestion in regards to [that]. I substituted [that's] in return for [that has been]. It does make it smoother, thank you.
Dare I say, you might recognise yourself in that little flower? Hugs from the boys, ~ Geez.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.
author commentCandlewitch
Fri, 2022-05-13 10:48
wow!
thanks, dearest Geezer!!! >{^*;*^}<
*hugs, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Ray Whitaker
Fri, 2022-05-13 14:04
Yeah, I thought of Cat as well
after reading this. your piece is very good!
this also reminded me of my teenage Grand-daughters
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Ray Whitaker
Fri, 2022-05-13 14:05
Yeah, I thought of Cat as well
after reading this. your piece is very good!
this also reminded me of my teenage Grand-daughters
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Mr joghe
Fri, 2022-05-13 14:40
Nice title "A Flower in The
Nice title "A Flower in The Crack"
"Words are currency of ideas and have the power to change world. Ride your pen on the rough road."
lovedly
Sun, 2022-05-15 23:04
i once read a poem
Flowering Rose
in the crack
of a cement wall
and
this poem I can help transpose
to read for ADULTS only
change word or two maybe few
lol Gee Don't take me seriously
I not yet so B