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do we really live beyond life

do we really live beyond life

Living tributes for immortals

Tributes to humans: Who live for ever
When poets and composers pass away
they may not pass this way again
but note such lovers of wisdom and humanity live all the way
they never really pass away
only such great personalities do stay
I say
some day... one day...maybe not far away
I too may join them I wish and pray
then only someone will come and say
did this person ever walk this way.

Einstein so did of the great Indian MG say
years hence generations will never accept
such a soul ever walked this way
but yes he too did pass away
yet but for... in the hearts of millions to stay

where he is no one can say
in memorials of memories his voice today
as imprints lasts for that day
when the newer folks will say
was he also human
No, they will shake their heads in disbelief
which only twas Einstein's and now my belief

I tread the path in open harmony
someone will someday say of me
who was
this lively one
a poet or human

God bless the souls as per you,
who leave behind
A sole human view

do we really live beyond life

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

but what's with all the ellipsis? They are meant to replace things said between what we actually print. I don't feel anything between the comments in the line. They're just decorations and I don't think they are necessary. The poem would benefit without them.
One hundred thousand years from now, no will know that we lived nor care... no matter who we are.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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use ..........
u say i will remove
if it adds to beauty of the poetry

no since 7000 years Lords RAMA KRISHNA and 2500 years Gautama Buddha and since 2000 years we all bow to Jesus daily who knows I or you may be statued for our ellipsis poetry ..
TAKE CARE
Hence I will declare myself a
LORD LOVEDLY
let all Neopoet know it

Who makes Lords
but people like you mostly
not me..
Snow man

author comment

de -ellipsified
yes reads better

author comment

I like this, but I still think there is some waffle as you try to keep to rhyme - really not necessary imo
I've bracketed the parts i think are unnecessary - keep in mind that this is only my opinion - don't change things just because i say :)

(do we really live beyond life
Living tributes for immortals) - these two lines not needed imo

Tributes to humans: Who live for ever
When poets and composers pass away
(they may not pass this way again) - cliche
but note such lovers of wisdom and humanity (live all the way
they) never really pass (away)
(only) such great personalities (do) stay
I say
some day... one day...maybe not far away
I too may join them (I wish and pray)
then only someone will come and say
did this person ever walk this way.

Einstein so did of the great Indian MG say
years hence generations will never accept
such a soul ever walked (this way)
but yes he too did pass away
yet but for... in the hearts of millions to stay

where he is no one can say
in memorials of memories his voice today
as imprints lasts (for that day)
when the newer folks will say
was he also human
No, they will shake their heads in disbelief
which only twas Einstein's and now my belief

I tread the path in open harmony
someone will someday say of me
who was
this lively one
a poet or human

God bless the souls (as per you,)
who leave behind
A sole human view

do we really live beyond life

Love judy
xxx

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

of course I now understand
how kind you are to hold my hand ,
I shall amend f
or what use else is your kindness
thanks
I missed your finer brush Judy
hope you are fully recovered

author comment
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