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"Damp gusset"

I'm gonna get me a pair o' lederhosen,
the kind Adolf used to wear,
Not the attire the missus woulda chosen
they're sorta kinky - to be fair,

But they made his balls look massive,
n they made his arse look taut -
We all know the guy weren't passive
n did things he shouldn'ta ought.

I bet ya missus Hitler loved him
with his dick hung out one side,
And as for bombin London,,,
WELL -- we'll let that fucker slide !

Coz the guy he sure were stylish
in his liddle leather shorts,
goose steppin all the while-ish

In damp gusset - and - supports.


Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content
Opt-in: Neopoet AI will critique your poem.


The below is a computer generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

This poem, titled "Damp gusset," is a controversial and potentially offensive piece that explores the speaker's desire to wear lederhosen like Adolf Hitler. The language used is crude and vulgar, with references to Hitler's genitalia and the bombing of London. While the poem may attempt to be humorous or satirical, it ultimately falls flat and comes across as tasteless and insensitive.

One suggested line edit would be to remove the line "And as for bombin London,,, WELL -- we'll let that fucker slide!" as it could be perceived as glorifying or excusing Hitler's actions. This change would not only improve the sensitivity of the poem but also improve its overall tone.

Overall, "Damp gusset" is a poem that may not be appropriate for all audiences due to its controversial subject matter and crude language. While poetry can be a powerful tool for exploring difficult topics, it is important to approach these topics with sensitivity and respect.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to

Dear, IA, (Iron arse), Sensitivity is but a dot in the distance.

author comment

"We are poets and adults if you cannot deal with controversial subjects and crude language then you should stop trying to be a poet and grow up.
" OH, Thank God! Mark. Bless you my son !

Regardless as to "is it poetry or not",
please, please, please, don't ring fence anything from ridicule,
I'd be out of a job for fuck sake !!!


author comment

Oh my god, that was fecking hilarious but your response to IA was brilliant :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

Thank you Ruby.

I was just reading your "Buzzard" piece, I'll have a pop at critiquing later if thats ok.

Obi.,,,,,,,,, (well, I say critiquing but that might be a bit fancy really )

author comment

Thanks Obi
I've just read your poem again, I can't stop laughing. Try reading it out loud, you'll be gasping for breath by the second verse. :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

Oh, Obi, your language is crude
You're a feckless, perverse effin' dude
how we crow while supposin'
you'ld chew lederhosen
While composin' your odes in the nude!


. like my lost dreams...the flood

As ever dear chap, I thank you for the sleight !

Yers. (bollock naked) Obi.

author comment

and rough language never hurt anyone. I'm sure there are people on both sides of the fence on this. Some of us older members are inured to the crude and crass, insensitive, odes posted from your page. It isn't as horrible as a few of the personages here have posted. Well, maybe the crack about Hitler bombing London... but I suspect that anyone who does object, will be circumspect in their remarks. ~ Geez.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I'm quite a nice chap actually Geez, well spoken (at times), clean shaven, square of chin buff n thin ( I feckin wish)

Anyone that finds this in the slightest bit offensive really ought get a grip on their emotions .


author comment

Dear Obi, every time I read this I laugh.
When will you be posting another poem, I'd like another laugh :)

Give and grow - let's raise our verses together. I'm happy to comment on your work and appreciate a comment on mine.

Thanks, Ruby.


author comment
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