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Chariot To Hell... Feb. 2023

Blacked out window tint
Matte black paint and flames
Red leather steering wheel
crimson seats with his name

Muffled roar unleashed
that engine really purrs
and it jumps off the road
when you're giving it the spurs

Twelve hundred muscled horses
putting down to the rears
got an electric transmission
and six forward gears

Music assault from speakers
high decibels pouring out
You hardly hear what's said
even though he shouts

"Come ride with me this night
we'll tear up every street
In my chariot to Hell
Come ride with me, My Sweet!"

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
Thank you all that gave me advice and commented. This is what we are! ~ Geezer. .
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

The Devils own chariot no doubt. Who wouldn't want a ride in this chariot so well described. It reminded me of a poem I once wrote "Black Hearse" but of course that one that was not a 'hot rod ' to Satanic specifications. And this chariot is going to a unique destination as well "Hell". What a ride!
Such a great poem I can almost hear the engine turning over to the thumping of the speakers or see the blood colored upholstery with the red leather steering wheel. What a feel!

Great Poem. I really enjoyed it.
Poets Hand
Hannah

If you enjoyed this one, you might like another like kind of like it? Search out "Racing Nights". ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Is fantastic!! Sounds like my kind of ride!! Excellent choice of music as my muse joins him for a ride.

~RoseBlack~

Cuz it’s a Clutch song. Lol

Exactly!

~RoseBlack~

I felt like I should leave the music optional and let people decide what they wanted to hear. I'll bet they had a great time!
Who wants to say Mosh? LoL
~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

I'll give the devil a run for his money

~RoseBlack~

Muffled roar (un)leashed
his engine really purrs
but it jumps off the road
when you're giving it the spurs

And

Music assault from speakers
high (decibels) pouring out
You hardly hear what's said
even though he shouts

Decibels always gets me. What’s worse is the abbreviation dB. You’re in good hands when it comes to the science of sound.

Another great job
Tim

I was not going for the full Monty in those lines
I wanted to project the idea that he was keeping it underwraps
until securing a passenger; but ya know what? Screw that!
He's out for a great time and he's not holding back! Sic'em Killer!
The car, by the way is somewhat truth. I had a '63 Ford Galaxie 500 with a HO 351
Hooker headers, 4 BBL Holly, dual Mallory ignition 4spd.
Not blk, it was Bronze with red interior.
Thanks for the ideas. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

this is brilliant! I love the whole poem! some great writing done here!

*love & hugs, Cat
*ever, eddy

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

would be one of those up for a night on the town! It's fun when you go out with someone and have no expectations, other than a rocking good time! Glad you enjoyed. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

I suggest stay back here

send all others to HELL
AT YOUR COSTS

NEOPOETS need you here
do you hear....
No!

old dude! I know you still got some rocking in you! Killer will bring you back by dawn! You know you want to go! ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

First off Tim had some great suggestions.

I think is is an awesome poem. I love it when you write like this.

Thanks for the wild ride to hell.

Love and higgliest bugs Sis xox

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

Every once in a while, Killer just wants to go tear up some streets and party hearty! You know, you are always invited! Whatever music you want! Fireball whiskey with no hangover or lasting effects. [Hey, if you're going to write fantasy, do it right]. Which means I won't have a migraine, you won't have any med issues, and everyone goes home safe and sound just as the sun comes up. What could be better than that? Love ya Sis, Higgest bugs. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment
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