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Beloved (for: Steven, my mate)

Beloved...
for: Steven

be calmed...
my beating heart
finds tranquility,
within viewing
the crags and lines
of his beloved face,
for he is
as the dawn to me.
a light,
that promises life
a new morning
of discoveries
in an otherwise
mundane existence.
he is the universe
I subscribe to,
he crowns
my actuality
with all the glory
of his composition.
because of him
I am immortal,
burning with
the fire of the brightest star,
potent as combustion
in an infinite firmament!

*

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

This is pure adoration given to someone whose creative value has enlightened your life in one way. What a lovely creativity!

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

he is my first reason for living. poetry is my second love. thank you so much for reading and responding!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

This is pure adoration given to someone whose creative value has enlightened your life in one way. What a lovely creativity!

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

So good to write about. It would be difficult to read anything but a caring, gentle space in what you wrote. Congratulations on finding someone like you have!

I have never been terribly fond of the short lines, and that is just me. Lots of folk write in the short lines. I have some difficulty getting my point made except in more words in a line.

Yiu piece flows very well, and I like it!

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Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
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the short line just works for me in some poems. in others I like a longer line. thank you for reading and giving me your honest opinion. I appreciate that very much!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

yup!,

you nailed it. No critique, Steve would kill me!!...& possibly eddy!

Perfect!

One

.
"with all that I am & all that I could be, I walk this earth, yet nobody sees me"

thank you for your support , and the joke, LOL to tell the truth, he is embarrassed by the poem. I miss you, where have you been? don't stay away so long!

*love, Sis

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

hit a mark here, with anyone who has ever purely loved another. I will just have to steal the word that Jack Webb used, to describe my feelings about this piece. Exquisite! ~ Hugs, from the boys. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

for reading and commenting...he is the light in my life. it took me 30 years and 3 marriages to find him. when I quit looking, that is when I found him. he is a bit myopic, he thinks he is the lucky one, LOL

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment

Just laughing here. So funny indeed Geezer.

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

as the observant
have already said

I SAY
E X Q U I S I T E L Y
EXQUISITE

any one would be jealous
as one corrected me say man
zealous

Cats that you b
all Neos can c

thanks lovedly!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

author comment
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