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BEAUTIFUL SOUL

Your taintless heart
your embodiment of
blessed qualities
stimulate your resplendent
glow of attraction

©® Onyinyechi Cosmos Etu

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
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Editing stage: 
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Comments

Your taintless heart
your embodiment of
blessed qualities
stimulates your resplendent
glow of attraction

Change to stimulate. A quality stimulates. Qualities stimulate. A taintless heart stimulates but that’s the subject. Your embodiment of blessed qualities is an adverb clause of the verb stimulate as is your resplendent glow of attraction. English is weird with verbiage.

Excellent language usage otherwise,
Tim

Very much for the eagle eye. Your suggestions are very good and accepted. Your tutoring is very impressive.
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"Time will crush on us if we don't utilize it. Just remember, you're an element of time".

~Jackweb

author comment

the girl for you! She glows like a beacon. Like a moth to the flame, get her number and name. Good, succinct, terse poetry, that gives the girl in question ten points! Good verse. ~ Geezer.
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Writing purely for oneself, is the ultimate in defensive posture.

'Get her number and name'. Gee, you made me laugh here. Thanks for your understanding and beautiful comments in regards to the poem.
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"Time will crush on us if we don't utilize it. Just remember, you're an element of time".

~Jackweb

author comment

So much for stopping by. I appreciate it.
.

"Time will crush on us if we don't utilize it. Just remember, you're an element of time".

~Jackweb

author comment

Love this ...x

A bunch for stopping by.
.

"Time will crush on us if we don't utilize it. Just remember, you're an element of time".

~Jackweb

author comment

Simply loved it!

So much for stopping by.
.

"Time will crush on us if we don't utilize it. Just remember, you're an element of time".

~Jackweb

author comment

np :)

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