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Anxiety

Watery eyes,

clenched teeth,

tense shoulders.

There it is again-

that subtle pain behind my right shoulder blade.

I feel my hair brush against my ear,

blanket too hot,

shorts crooked.

The single light in this room

has rainbow rays through the tears...

Why is it buzzing so loud?

I listen to myself breathe.

It’s getting faster now.

It’s all so loud!

...
I shuffle to find my safe space:

I write.

Pen on paper,

Scratches to script.

My hand on the page

shaking, now gliding.

The smell of ink,

sweet and familiar.

It is written,

It is quiet again.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

I felt every bit of this poem. I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks and have experienced everything you described. Another emotive, honest write. Well done.

~RoseBlack~

Thank you! Writing is my remedy so sometimes poems like this come out. It's the raw truth of what happened on a random night a few months ago.

author comment

You convey the mood of axiety. The movement gives off a scary vibe for me. It's like the writer is manic. But he is calmed down by writing.

That's exactly the vibe I was going for, so thank you!

author comment

I am also a person that loves being alone to write and get rid of the thoughts that bother me. Sometimes, I post them!
The things that you see here, are mostly the leftovers of what comes about from selecting only what I want people know. So, I get it. I think that people like you are very brave to expose themselves as you do. I noticed the things that bother you, like the shorts twisted, the strands of hair and the buzzing light. All those things make for a great write, descripting the scene is a great way to help the reader see. Excellent! ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

It's difficult to put experiences like this into writing sometimes, but I tried my best to describe it. Thank you so much!

author comment

writing is my way of beating the world to keep it back. it loves to encroach. I love what you have written here. I feel a kin-ship.

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

I love writing things that other people can relate to! Although, this is not the type of experience I would wish on anyone. I'm thankful that we have both found our remedies. Thank you so much!

author comment

Are the worst ever. Even fully aware of what’s going on it’s just frightening. Knowing I’m having a panic attack doesn’t really stop them. Luckily, I’m having them very sparsely of late. This is really spot on. It is loud like a tornado and it is like it just passes and gets quiet again after.

Well written
Tim

They are the worst. I have found a few things that have helped me through them. An app called Finch, breathing exercises, grounding, music, and writing. Depending on where I am or what I'm doing, I'll use these to help me get back to reality. In this case, it was writing.

Thank you!! :)

author comment

the portrayal of anxiety is thorough.

a suggestion: decrease the use of white space, group some lines together -those that are continuation of a thought. IMHO, this would make the poem more readable.

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Raywhitakerblog.wordpress.com
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Thank you for the suggestion. I typically group my lines together but when I type out my poems, I typically space them as I wrote them, give or take a few adjustments. I tried to keep this one as authentic as I wrote it originally. I appreciate the feedback!

author comment

I like the choppiness. It reminds me of the uncontrollably quick, illogical, incomplete monologue of myself mid panic. I would argue that it lends to the effectiveness in this particular case but…I would tend to agree with Ray in most other cases.

Tim

Thank you! I do typically group my lines together more than I did with this one, as Ray suggested. The spacing was intentional because that was how I wrote it when I was mid-anxiety attack. I tried to keep it as authentic as possible, give or take a few adjustments to the words so it was actually comprehensible. I appreciate the feedback!

author comment
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