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Neopoet Weekly 09/8/24 to 09/14/24 Winner!

This Week’s Winner is  Edward nigma

 

 Cage of cards

 

 Chaotically clustered
cage of
cards covering
all
cynically silent
sides of life
plainly plastered
before my
persistently passing
presence of
the present day.
Thoughtlessly thrashing
out the leisurely
overlapping lanes
of possibilities
prancing through
the pressuring palms
of probability.
With a single stern stomp
taking back the cross
mask of control.
There steadily
stumbled down
the obliquely built
walls of ambiguity
freely falling at
my frivolously
fleeting feet.
Vigorously revealing
the vaguely vapid
valley of victorious
vultures who
persistently preys
upon the weak
minded ones
who decisively numb
themselves within naivety .
But still
I walk forth
ahead through
the foreboding facade
of fear
lying before me.

 

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Comments

Hi, I enjoyed this. Lots of alliteration, maybe a tad too much, but overall a great feeling of disheveled dissatisfaction. Keep writing. It would be fun to read aloud with maybe a note of sarcasm, yes?

SB

I would add some imagery just enough to have more of an impact and compose it so no need of punctuation.
Just what I have done and been succesful with in regards.
Hope you are feeling well,
Mark

"Ghosts of electricity howl in the bones of her face."
~Bob Dylan~

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