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lazy bairn are born of the flightless stork
an angry face of four and twenty
slacked, defeated
eroded by karma's vengeful smacks
and disappointment's relentless howl
as he would say
a luck insurmountable
dragging, yanking
incomparably worse by far
than joan d'arc's own standards
as he'd tell it
each red light an opportunity
that's shooed at every green,
hope at every shared glance
met with cold closed window,
unsated, his hungry hand
stays
as his story goes
a phoned-in father
with an ignorant wife
bent to his every whim
no structure is made of spared rods
no pearls passed down
as you already know
a shield of cardboard
thwarting, protecting
keeping any ambition at bay
a paladin against self-respect
as his sharpied words show
anything hasn't helped
this isn't the change you need
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage:
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Comments
Ian.T
Fri, 2013-08-02 03:34
"0"
Good exercise for you to find out why the "0"
Look to the future look to the past His Number is Zero!!
Good write though I struggled a little in the flow I will wait for others to read and comment..
Your Title "lazy bairn are born of the flightless stork".
this has to be plural or singular it can be without the "are" or with "bairns" can't see it being as written??
Take care keep writing just keep an eye on titles they are very important, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..