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Moonlight Salvation

A crest of waves
fall deep in the night
by the light of a silver moon
your feet step gently, upon the sand
a meeting to resume
your heart is pounding,
tears rain down
your mind couched safely
within a prayer
fear not, a voice whispers
all is well
by the light of a silver moon!

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
We all need moments to make a connection. We need people if only to empathize and validate our constantly changing situations.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

We all need moments to make a connection with people who we can confide in.

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

author comment

like this meditative psalm.
Your title is pretty good, it caught my eye.
The language use is also good and produces a calm reasoning
for the reader. One thing I would change, is using the word [fall] in the fourth line,
so closely to the previous [fall]. Perhaps you might use [step] or some other word
in lieu of it? The pacing is sedate, which I would expect in a prayerful piece
like this. The beginning set the pace and maintained it smoothly to the end.
Nice work! ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I'm sorry that I didn't get to chat with you and if you read this. Thank you for your interest in my writing. I sincerely
appreciate it!

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

author comment

I looked at it again and felt good about your comment. I hope you don't mind me using the word step. As always
thanks for commenting and I'm glad you enjoyed this.

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

author comment

I looked at it again and felt good about your comment. I hope you don't mind me using the word step. As always
thanks for commenting and I'm glad you enjoyed this.

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

author comment

As an experiment, we are using a leading large language model (in other words, AI) to provide critiques of poems that were posted recently. Please let us know what you think.

Computer critique:

"Moonlight Salvation" is a free verse poem that paints a serene and emotional scene by the sea under the light of a silver moon. The poem explores a moment of connection and reassurance, using vivid imagery and a gentle rhythm to evoke a sense of peace and solace.

The title effectively captures the poem's themes of redemption and comfort, while also alluding to the moonlit setting. The language used throughout the poem is evocative, with phrases like "crest of waves," "silver moon," and "tears rain down" creating a vivid and picturesque scene that is easy for the reader to envision.

The poem's rhythm and pacing are well-executed, with the lines flowing smoothly and naturally. The gentle cadence of the poem mirrors the soothing and comforting theme, further enhancing the reader's engagement with the poem.

The beginning of the poem effectively sets the scene, with the reader being introduced to the nighttime beach setting and the protagonist's emotional state. The poem's ending, featuring a whispering voice that reassures the protagonist, brings a sense of closure and comfort to the narrative.

The internal logic of the poem is consistent, as the poem maintains a focus on the central themes of connection, reassurance, and the healing power of nature. The poem's message, that people need moments of connection and empathy to navigate their ever-changing situations, is effectively conveyed through the imagery and narrative.

In conclusion, "Moonlight Salvation" is a well-crafted and evocative free verse poem that explores themes of connection, reassurance, and the healing power of nature. The vivid imagery, gentle rhythm, and effective language use create a serene and emotional scene that engages the reader and conveys the poem's message. The beginning and ending of the poem work together to create a sense of closure and comfort, while the internal logic remains consistent throughout.

This is exactly the response that I wanted maybe even to good. I enjoyed the interpretation, but more so the
interactions made with Alexa and Geezer. They bring a human element into the works that I feel is needed. Overall
I definitely was pleased with its interpretation. Can anyone give me the coupon code for premium membership?

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

author comment

don't have a problem with you using a word or piece of advice I give you, anytime. That is why I give critique and comments. I usually add the line, that "Feel free to use anything I give you or add to it. Make it your own or think of something better. If you would like a trial of one month premium, we will do that. Thank you.
`Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thanks again for your help and I would definitely like a trial of premium. Just message me on how to get it.

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

author comment

really lovely! I agree that we all need someone that we can confide in. I think as humans we long for that connection and when we find it, it brings such peace.

~RoseBlack~

you have greatly captured my attention with your involvement with the night and mistress moon! (my moon is in Cancer of the moon signs.) I find your poem seductive and serene. it flows well and is like a gentle kiss given with a soft smile! I much like it! good work!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thank you for reading. It has been a beautiful experience writing, but especially reading all of the comments.
The acceptance and validation I've received thus far are heart warming. I hope that you like todays submission also.

Thanks again, John

The power of our language can and will change the world.
Successively until our languages become one!

author comment

I have seen your name often in the stream but I think this maybe the first time I have responded to your poetry. I have not been responding to much poetry because I have been writing the story of my life as advised by Seren!

you have a lovely and unique style about your poems. I will be sure to read more later and on a daily basis because I enjoyed it. may I please address you as: A. Night? I have fibro Myalgia (sp?) and psoriatic arthritis. thank you for your consideration,

*Hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

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