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Tonic

In a time of quiet cold
when all the fields of clover sleep
biding time in silent rest
buried in the snowy deep
encased in white purity
I name thee patience

With every passing breath
rise and fall of every tide
riding with our mother moon
feelings ebb and flow inside
afloat upon your waves
I strive for peace

Gather every falling tear
the ocean and the salt
bottle them so I may hold
deep and empathetic thoughts
I drink this daily tonic
my compassion

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

this style: where every stanza has two lines that sum up the verse. I forget what this is called, but you have done a great job here. Yes, "Tonic" seems right; a daily dose of tonic. I could do that. ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I like these lines:

With every passing breath
rise and fall of every tide
riding with our mother moon
feelings ebb and flow inside
afloat upon your waves

I have an affinity for Mother Moon, for she is my mistress. thanks for writing this!

* great hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Ok I’m about to drop 3 volumes of poetry. The first is untitled as of yet and it’s a bit of everything. Starting around Sept 29th of 2022 I started writing a poem (or more) a day. I’ve kept that pace so far. So from just after the fall equinox until the winter solstice will be a volume and I’m keeping the title secret. Then from Dec 21st until March 21st is another volume, again the title is secret. This is the stuff you’re reading now and yes it’s winter themed.
Then on march 21st I release a new album of music (on 3.21.23 32123 is a palindrome as well as the equinox) and I start on the next volume which I also have a secret title for.

Considering everything I write is destined for publication I think they should all be masterpieces. Always layers of symbolism. Always deeper meaning. Always listening to the music of the cycles. I don’t go in for that pop music for the sake of noise in my ear a whole lot, better have something serious to say or I’m moving on.

I guess I’m just a serious dude.
Tim

author comment

This is absolutely gorgeous, I absolutely adore this poem, I think it's up there with one of your best imo.

Congratulations on being published. I would love to own your books, so please share links where I can purchase your books!!!

I can tell you now, my first novel (Not poetry) its a fantasy trilogy the first of which will be published on the 11th of December this year in time for Christmas. I will have a few copies to give to those interested. I've worked on these projects for nearly 11yrs to get here. I know how hard it is to get published.

Cheers Jayne x

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

But I love you all and your kind words. I apologize to you all for being less active this past week. I’m just a little busier than usual with a bunch of random things.

It’s been a learning process with formatting and things and I’m like my own editor and publisher so there’s really no urgency but I’m starting the process now. The writing is easy, the logistics are somewhat intimidating but I’ll get there.

I really appreciate this community and I love the support I get. Geezer has been a great critic and the feedback all around is always welcome and appreciated.

Thank you dear poets,
Tim

author comment

that I could help in any way! ~ Geez.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Something I strive for on the daily. I love how you captured the feel and having to work to achieve it. Beautifully written as always.

~RoseBlack~

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