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Vermillion Red

Ink on our map won't change. The way I cock my head will. While I look for us amongst the topography. How upside down will you hold my world for me today. What may come from conclusions drawn atop crooked necks.

Spin the wheel with me. Make believe culpability belongs here because choice used to. When the floor gets damp what else might I expect from you? You grow gills when the wind gets wet. You breathe fire in the softest way. You lit a cigarette sunset to make vermillion red.

Show me the angles. Teach me the turns. First the wrong ones and then the rest. Tell me how I'll be the one teaching you at the end. I'll pave right through dead ends to make the turns you're sure are right. I don't recall how long I've known you. I can tell you in my sleep how long we've loved.

I'll slip from our bed at night only to murder doubt and bludgeon hope. My hands are clean and gentle come to rest on your hips again. That blood will stick to any hands but ours.

My lips can be yours. My earlobes and my mustache too. My middle toes and my mouth and the rest of my foot to boot. I'd like that. When I'm yours, I am yours alone. When I am with you, I am nowhere else. Without you I'm nowhere now. But I know the map and my way will be made back.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Wow!!! Speechless.

This is breathtaking and tugs a nerve in the pit of my stomach.

Magnificent. I won't offer anything but...

Bravo!!!

Kind regards Jayne-Chloe

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

It is high praise to be sure. To hear that anything we've written could have the hands to tug at anything meaningful in the world of another. Thank you for reading and I love that it impacted you thusly.

author comment

It's a good poem that evokes physical reaction.

This is one.

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

It was worth it.

Tim

I am touched. Thank you for reading. Yes this one....doesn't really have a proper poetic form that I've found anyway. So it sits prosaic but I'm ok with that sometimes :)

author comment

I read through your comments and am pleased to see that others are discovering your excellence too! my favorite lines are:

Show me the angles. Teach me the turns. First the wrong ones and then the rest. Tell me how I'll be the one teaching you at the end. I'll pave right through dead ends to make the turns you're sure are right. I don't recall how long I've known you. I can tell you in my sleep how long we've loved.

the whole poem reminds me of a relationship I experienced a very long time ago. he was 23, I was 17. it was one of the sweetest times of my life. we shared our heads, hearts, bodies and poetry... and a glass of wine.. I can still hear his full bodied laugh... he made me feel like I was a genius and I gave him all I had. the memory is so very welcome. thanks for giving that back to me!

*hugs, Cat

p.s.
this is one of your best.

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When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

I appreciate your endless and inspiring encouragement. Truly. And oh oh oh how I love to know my work can summon these sweet things we all have under our vests from our previous lives. Memories. When mine can bring to bear an energy that triggers something for you or another. That is transmutation pure and simple. It's a reminder of something beautiful about human beings and culture and language. Thank you my friend.

author comment

I love your work, as I can really relate to it. your poetry reaches down inside of me and sounds a chord!

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

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