Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned

I can see you shaking
and I can hear you breathing
and I know what you’re doing
and I know what you’re thinking.

I can feel the anger.
You’re bursting at the seam.
You’re smoking from your ears
and I can’t escape the steam.

My skin is crawling.
I don’t know what to do.
You stand and turn to me
Oh God, what do I do?

Fight or flight,
just to survive,
I run to you,
overdrive.

God, please forgive me!
I wrap up my hands.
I strangle your neck
leaving red bands.

I know it was wrong,
but I’m finally free.
Oh, God! What have I done?
Father, forgive me.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Explicit Content

Comments

This is a very visual poem that I enjoyed.

I'm glad you enjoyed it!

author comment

Visual indeed. While reading I was still watching it.
.

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

Thanks very much! I hope you enjoyed it.

author comment

Visual indeed. While reading I was still watching it.
.

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.