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If Wishes Were...

Submitted by Geezer on Sun, 2021-08-08 15:03

There are things that I wish for
like; remembering with clarity
where those things that went awry
left the track, and headed for disaster

I wish that I had heeded those inner-voices
and not made poor decisions
and took even poorer actions
Thinking that of all; I was the Master

I wish...I wish...I wish...

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Editing stage: 
Editing - draft
Contest: 
Neopoet Random Challenge 6
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Obadiah Grey

Tue, 2021-08-10 11:58

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Heres to all the fuck ups
the whoopsies and oh shits,
the bollocks dropped,
the films that flopped.
and god bless all - halfwits.

Obi.

Geezer

Wed, 2021-08-11 07:29

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Exactly! ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Abby

Tue, 2021-08-31 14:57

Abby's picture

The thing I like best about this is that this has been everyone at some point. After doing something I regret there's always that aha moment where I'm like "god, I didn't even really need to do that." I like the line, "I wish that I had heeded those inner-voices."

"To fly is to fall."

Geezer

Tue, 2021-08-31 17:19

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I do try to be relatable to the reader! I am eager to see some more work from you and hope that you will find skills that you will use in your writing the rest of your life. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Seren

Wed, 2023-02-15 12:09

Seren's picture

OK I really need to go to bed. I put my comment in the wrong place. Sorry lol
Love xox

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

lovedly

Tue, 2021-08-31 16:32

lovedly's picture

I know that only
please excuse me Gee

''any one would ride with thee
lol
Do u agree'''

but sadly
NO NO NOT ME

Geezer

Tue, 2021-08-31 17:25

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rather ride than walk, as Killer would tell you. Why, don't you like horses? I was scared of them for the longest time, because I was kicked by one. Really hard! But I don't blame the horse, he was startled and I forgave him. It was so long ago, that he is probably dead now and who could keep a grudge against a dead horse? LoL
~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Seren

Wed, 2023-02-15 12:08

Seren's picture

"IF wishes were horses, beggars would ride" is a scottish proverb I believe. Loved was trying to recite it I think

Love xox

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

scribbler

Tue, 2021-08-31 23:53

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Yep we all wish we could have done some things better. But remember that the only people who make no mistakes are people who don't do anything

Gracy

Sat, 2021-09-04 18:52

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Hi Geez, your poem is certainly relatable...new word for me...lol. I seem to have erred so often in life that I've lost count.
Original issue to write about, you surprised me!
Enjoyed, Gracy

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

Geezer

Sun, 2021-09-05 06:28

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I try to think outside the box, yet relate to things that will concern my readers. I have no doubt that there are many that wish they had done things differently in certain situations! ~ Where have you been? Let's see some poetry from you! I miss seeing your work. ~Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

author comment

Seren

Wed, 2023-02-15 11:52

Seren's picture

I can't say anymore than this tonight? I wish, I wish, I wish yep I've had that sort of night

Well done I love this one!

Love and higgliest bugs Sis xox

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W.B. Yeats

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